The ineffective expression of emotions

Three most common forms of ineffective emotional expression

·      Speaking in Generalities: Means making general statements, which do not convey the speaker’s real feelings. Eg. I feel bad, I am happy, I am sad.

The reason for speaking in generalities is often times the limited emotional vocabulary that restricts our ability to communicate with others.

·      Not owning Feelings: Means holding someone else responsible for our own emotions. Example: 1. You make me angry, you hurt my feelings, and you made me fall down. 2. We are in this disaster because of you, see what you got me in.

Not owning feelings is a way of accusing someone else, which is one of the most common obstacles to effective expression of emotions.

·      Counterfeit Emotional Language: Means using language that seems to express emotions but does not actually describe what a person is feeling.

Example: 1. Why are you not leaving me alone? This statement does not convey if the speaker is angry with the person in front, frustrated, irritated or it is just a casual question. 2. What is on your mind after all?